| |
| |
|
Coaching Information |
|
|
|
Time Travel
Let me quote something you wrote. "When you reach the boundary between like and love, you know you are entering a different country. You are beyond newness and infatuation. You know what Shakespeare meant when he called love 'an ever-fixed mark that looks on tempests and is never shaken.'" On one level, I agree with what you say. But I believe very few of us find what you describe. We end up settling when we reach a point at which we realize it is either that or being alone. I, for one, have never felt what you describe and recently have come to terms that I will not. I am 50, outgoing, attractive and independent, with two children who are blessings I would never have if I did not "settle." I know I will never make that mistake again, and I find I am alone and probably always will be. Is love the luck of the draw? Are some of us just luckier than others? Or is it something lacking in me? I would love to know. Linda Linda, sixty years ago the science fiction writer René Barjavel asked what would happen if you traveled back in time and killed your grandfather before he met your grandmother. Could this happen? If it did, you would not exist, so how could you travel back in time? This dilemma is known as the grandfather paradox. When you "settled," how did you know the next man wouldn't have been the perfect one for you? How did you know the children wouldn't have been his and your children? When you are of the mindset of settling, you're not thinking of love but of other things--marriage, a house, children. You've traded love for a time schedule. When you "settle" for a house, how many more houses do you visit with your real estate agent? None. How do you know the next house wouldn't be the one of your heart's desire? When you are dating, married to, or pregnant by a man you settled for, how likely is it you can see or be seen by the one for you? It would be as easy for us to say your children would have been in your future, if you'd waited. Now you want to discount this idea again, but you are closer to it now than when you settled--because now you don't want to settle. This has more to do with patience than with luck. You don't stop trying to balance your checkbook until things balance. Perhaps it is your fate to come to this knowing now. Why could this not happen for you now? Why not tomorrow or next month or next year? When you are living your life fully, engaging with others, knowing what you want, why not now? Wayne & Tamara Theoretically Speaking My relationship started off as a holiday romance and has had trouble developing into a normal relationship. We met in Spain and fell for each other immediately. We were both over the moon, but when we moved in together, things began to deteriorate. He wasn't sure what he wanted. I felt neglected and reacted badly by contacting an old flame. He thinks I nag. Once, in a rage, I told him I don't want to be with him anymore. Now he's angry and refuses to speak to me until he thinks things through. It upsets me because I know we're both very much in love, but no matter what we do we can't seem to make it work. Jayne Jayne, in science competing theories are tested against each other to determine which is true. You believe you and your boyfriend are in love. That is your claim. We have an alternative hypothesis. It was a holiday fling. On our side we point to verbal rage, nagging, confusion, and unfaithfulness. What evidence is there for your theory? Wayne & Tamara Direct Answers - Column for the week of September 20, 2004 About The Author Authors and columnists Wayne and Tamara Mitchell can be reached at www.WayneAndTamara.com. Send letters to: Direct Answers, PO Box 964, Springfield, MO 65801 or email: DirectAnswers@WayneAndTamara.com.
MORE RESOURCES:
Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Who Are You Mixing It With? I talk and write a lot about Life Design - creating and sculpting a life that is fulfilling for you. It is about shaping your personal landscape and environment. Sometimes, It Just Takes ONE Conversation to Change Your Life! I was thinking this morning about the importance of the profession that I am in. Besides doing various trainings, workshops and consulting, I also coach people. Can Versus Cant It is my personal opinion that there are two words that are the driving force behind your personally achieving your ultimate outcome and your WHY in Life. These two words are the most powerful words that you can and will ever speak to yourself about any situation - "CAN" and "CAN'T" As I've said many times, "CAN" is a word of power; whereas, "CAN'T" is a word of retreat. Handling Disappointment Disappointment is an inevitable part of home-based business. Clients won't pay, bids fall through, or business associates don't come through on their promises or act unethically. We Are the Five People We Associate with Most Last month I was invited to participate in a charity golf tournament in Las Vegas to celebrate the life of the late dancing legend Gregory Hines. The event was held to raise funds and awareness of the tragic disease that took this entertainer's life. Making Changes in Your Personal Life Making changes in your personal life can be a tough process. Change starts with a thought. Coaching is Asking the Right Questions Have you ever known anyone who asked themselves "Why me?" over and over every time something happened they didn't like? Or how about, "What did I do to deserve this?" And my favorite, "Whose fault was that?" Perhaps, these questions have popped into your head once or twice before.When we ask ourselves questions, our brain hunts for the answer. Executive Coaching - Finding a Coach and Understanding the Process Nobody in business can fail to have noticed the recent rise in the number of coaches and consultants offering their services. But how do you go about finding a coach who will give you a return on your investment? Executive coaching might be an option for you if you are running your own business or are in an employed management role, and have aspirations to achieve more. Personal Strategic Planning I have a few questions for you ---What if we as individuals adapted and utilized some of the same tried and true processes and methods that have given businesses the edge they need to succeed over their competition? My sense is that understood and implemented correctly professionals would be able to gain the same competitive advantage. Remarkably, this is not anything overly complicated or new and I can't take credit for developing it. You Can Get There From Here But first you've got to raise your standards.I know at some point you had big dreams. What Is A Personal Trainer Imagine stepping into the gym for the first time in your life. There are so many machines and gadgets. Executive Coaching and Effective Learning We've all been through training events-workshops, seminars, and courses that didn't affect our behavior as much as we would have preferred. And while each provides valuable information and tools for increased productivity, most of us also understand what happens after the workshop is over. Enhancing Life for a Lifetime Do you often feel lonely, anxious, or even depressed? Is a mid-life or quarter-life crisis threatening your confidence, self-esteem and well-being? Do you yearn for practical advice on enhancing, balancing and bringing new joy to your personal and professional life?Tens of millions of Americans answer a resounding "yes" to one or more of those questions. After all, statistics report that more than 19 million of us are diagnosed with depression each year. Curbing the Public Nuisance (Part 2) Yes, that pillar of society that has been with us since that slithery dude threw humanity for a curve in the Garden of Eden - that cornerstone of society has been automated.I am speaking, of course, of the public nuisance ( I wrote about him in Part 1 at http://www. Take a Chance, Win a Prize I think that we're all probably familiar with the fairground rant 'take a chance, win a prize'. Whenever I hear this call to action, I immediately break out into a cold sweat. The Right Coach Who is the Best Coach For Achieving Your Goals?A friend of mine was recently at a Mark Victor Hansen and Robert Allen workshop. They were promoting their Enlightened Millionaire Program. Eureka! I've Found It! OK, so it wasn't quite that big of a deal. But I did find the "T" that mysteriously escaped from the word "not" in one of my articles a few months ago. The Need to Feel Special From the time Jennifer was a little child, she was demanding of attention, especially from her mother, Sarah. With two older brothers, Jennifer had a "special" place in the family as the baby and the only girl. Belief Management - The Missing Ingredient? "Joan, I'm working so hard and I'm not getting anything done!" I have heard some version of this cry of frustration by many an entrepreneur. It's a common complaint voiced by those of use who sought the freedom to have complete authority over our schedules, only to find ourselves unwittingly shackled by old ways of operating. People Pleasing and How to Stop! "People pleasing can leave you feeling empty and taken advantage of." Deb MeltonOne of the ways fear shows up in our lives and keeps us from living fully is when we become a people pleaser.
|
| home | site map |
| © 2007 |
